Many factors contribute to this strained relationship, and mothers should not take it upon themselves to shoulder all the blame. 6. Parents need to encourage their children to individuate and find their own identities to develop healthy self-esteem and respect for others. A 15-year-old boy brings home his school report. Not showing her love or affection as a mother. But if you grew up in an unhealthy family, you might have noticed that your own mother gave your sister more freedom than you, or she was much more controlling over them. If hes into something like woodworking or knitting, be supportive by helping him find resources for learning more about it, or even just encouraging him to pursue his passion. Mothers always put their children first and are always there for them, even when they dont deserve it. Mothers who micro-manage their children make them feel like they can t function without Mom. This is the more difficult kind of mother-son relationship to repair. But there are things that you can do to help your son understand how important his mother is to him, and how much she deserves to be treated with respect. If she just calls you up to talk about how youre doing in school or your plans for the weekend, it might seem like she only cares about making sure youre happy and healthy. But what happens when a mother is mistreated by her son? If it does not resolve, it can feel like a death. Please love your mother too. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'littleninjaparenting_com-large-mobile-banner-2','ezslot_12',603,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-littleninjaparenting_com-large-mobile-banner-2-0'); Oedipus Complex: Complex of emotions of the son around age 3-5 towards his mother that positively or negatively affects his future relationships depending on the attachments formed in his childhood environment (Source: Simply Psychology). Mothers should talk to their sons gently. Tell him what he did and why it was the right thing to do. Some sons have personality issues that cause them to mistreat their mothers. Adult sons are often influenced by these medias depiction of men as powerful and dominant, which can cause them to feel like they need to fit that image. Everyone needs to recognize that this does not mean that a son does not love his mother. What does it mean when We are Mathew Booe and Jackie Booe. It can be difficult for mothers to treat their adult son and daughter equally regarding discipline, love, and affection. It is also considered a normal way of parenting for mothers who have endured the same behavior from their own mothers. Control is also evident when mothers make decisions for their children without consulting them first. You can also get psychological or medical advice from professionals who can help you recover from this harmful behavior! The relationship between a mother and her son is complicated. This can be very frustrating for the son because he does not have a chance to express his feelings to his mother. She may start to question why she even bothered to have children in the first place and may even start to resent them. Mothers who are controlling usually have high expectations for their children. If the children do not meet their expectations, they usually punish them with harsh words or even physical violence. What constitutes a negative relationship with one's mother is a fairly broad set of possibilities, and some negative relationships are . It can often be challenging, but with these tips, you can create a healthy mother-son relationship. Sons who treat their mothers poorly are often lost and confused. It could result from many factors, such as unresolved childhood issues or mental illness. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,600],'littleninjaparenting_com-box-4','ezslot_3',149,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-littleninjaparenting_com-box-4-0'); As a mom of four, three of whom are sons, this is a topic near and dear to me. They may also resent her for not leaving the abuser when they had the chance. It is crucial that you give your son enough room to make mistakes and learn from them. Young sons rebel for a reason but with enough work, you can mend a broken relationship. There are many reasons why sons might treat their mothers poorly, but some of the most common reasons include: lack of respect, feeling neglected or unimportant, feeling like they have to compete with other members of the family, and feeling like their mothers are too controlling. The key to a healthy mother-son relationship is communication. A mother may wonder how her son could hate her after she gave birth to him. Little Ninja parenting is compensated for referring traffic and business to these companies. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'littleninjaparenting_com-large-mobile-banner-1','ezslot_11',110,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-littleninjaparenting_com-large-mobile-banner-1-0'); But there is a fine line between being protective and overbearing; between being supportive and being controlling. This may mean talking to a therapist or counselor who can help them deal with their feelings and figure out how to best cope. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'littleninjaparenting_com-banner-1','ezslot_6',108,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-littleninjaparenting_com-banner-1-0');Although this psychological study examined later-born, not first-born, boys, it did illustrate how mothers may treat their sons differently and, in turn, could lead to negative effects. A mother must show her son that she loves him without being too much. You can find it in a million memes, It's reiterated in personal essays from women who say their worst relationships were with men who yelled at their moms . This can cause the son to become angry and resentful towards his mother. You can also set up consequences for when these boundaries are crossed, but make sure theyre reasonable and that your son will actually follow through with them. A bossy mother will often want to know where her son is at all times, what hes doing, and who hes spending time with. Common Reasons Why Sons Treat Their Mothers Poorly. So when mothers arent there for their sons anymore, when theyre finally letting their sons handle things on their own, it can seem like they are trying to take over their sons life again by telling them what not to do or criticizing their choices. Renowned clinical psychologist and respected university professor, Jordan B. Peterson, has addressed the mother-son relationship extensively via professional talks and books. Poorly Seasoned Cast Iron - How to Tell and Fix. Theyre also hurting their mothers, who are often the closest people to them in the world. She's hoping her experience with parenting and everything in between can help other moms navigate the complex world of motherhood. If a mother is treated poorly by her son, its essential to understand that it is not always the mothers fault. 6 Ways To Keep The Zen! We have an extensive holistic parenting course just for you. A son may feel that his mother doesnt acknowledge him as a grown-up if she constantly refers to him as my child.. Youve probably heard the saying Mother knows best, but that doesnt mean your son always wants to hear what you have to say. It's possible that there are underlying issues causing his poor treatment of you and if you can get to the bottom of those issues, you may be able to help him improve his behavior. The son ends up resenting this behavior and his mother. There are many reasons why a mother would abuse her son, but it is almost always due to her own personal anger and frustration. Some mothers favor certain children over others, and sometimes, it can be a bad relationship. You dont have to agree with everything he does and say yes when he asks for something, but you must trust him enough to give him the space he needs to find his way and make mistakes along the way. In addition, she also taught education courses online as an adjunct professor, mentored numerous education interns, hosted professional development for educators, and tutored, as well as homeschooled. As a mother who knows the pain of an adult child's rejection, I formed an online community and wrote a book to help parents abandoned by adult children: Done With The Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children. This can lead to feelings of loneliness and isolation. Anger. He may start to believe that he will never be good enough for his mothers approval. if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'littleninjaparenting_com-netboard-1','ezslot_20',114,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-littleninjaparenting_com-netboard-1-0'); Sons who hate their mothers may get so tired of what they consider a toxic relationship that they simply abandon it altogether. If you think this is the reason your son is treating you badly, its important to take a step back and reassess how you interact with your son, and make sure youre not smothering him or overstepping boundaries. This can lead to the son feeling like he can never please his mother, no matter what he does. Its normal for adult sons to have conflicts with their mothers. This is usually tied to the mothers personal loneliness. Controlling mothers also believe their sons are more of a possession than a child. Sons Who Treat Their Mothers Poorly. eval(ez_write_tag([[120,600],'ciprofamily_com-box-4','ezslot_13',197,'0','0']));eval(ez_write_tag([[120,600],'ciprofamily_com-box-4','ezslot_14',197,'0','1']));.box-4-multi-197{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:15px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:15px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:600px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}This article will explore the reasons why some sons treat their mothers poorly and offer advice on how to break the cycle. If your mom knew or heard step dad's comments and didn't try to stop him, she is abusive too. If your son struggles to make friends or has problems in his romantic relationships, it might be because of how his mother has treated him. Here are some tell-tale signs that your mother-son relationship may need some attention: Controlling mothers are very common in todays world. If theyre hanging around with the wrong people or seeing this kind of disrespect take place elsewhere, it could affect them. She may try to manipulate him by saying things like,I know whats best for you,orYou need to do this because I said so.This type of mother-son relationship can be unhealthy for both parties involved because it can lead to resentment and anger on the sons part. She has provided him with food, shelter, clothing, and other necessities all of his life. Related Heres how to set boundaries for your in-laws. The dysfunction of the mother-son relationship will always affect his other relationships, in either big or small ways, whether the son likes or not.
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